With apologies and thanks to Wendy for the form...
Scout (noticing a dashboard light): Hey, the airbag is on. That's good.
Sporks: Yeah, but that's one thing I've discovered I don't like about my new car
Scout: What?
Sporks: Well the car will turn off the airbag for a child or small adult based on a weight sensor in the seat. And the other day I went to the store and put two fridge packs of soda on the seat. The car thought they were a small child and beeped at me to put the seatbelt on the whole way home.
Scout: Well, that would be ok if it were a sack of onions or something.
Sporks: I guess I could have just fastened the seat belt.
Scout: Yes, if you sat them vertically, they would be ok.
Sporks: (Laughing) Honey, you just need to fasten the belt. You don't actually have to fasten them in like a child... Hey wait, is that why you thought a sack of onions would be ok? Because they're child shaped and belt would fit nicely around them?
Scout: (Also laughing) I can be a little dim.
Sporks: Can I do a Wendy-like dialogue post?
Scout: (laughing) Sure.
Happy Friday. Keep your sodas and onions safe. Like children, they travel best in the back seat. Car seats optional.
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Insurance and religion
Yesterday I read Suburban Lesbian's latest post about religion and homosexuality. It got me to thinking. I've had a long and complicated relationship with religion as the daughter of a prominent woman minister. That my very straight brother followed her into the ministry makes things all the more complicated.
Last Easter I felt very guilty about not going to church though I had no actual interest in doing so. I worked out instead. My anxiety level went down after my workout. My therapist says that's a normal physiological reaction. So one lesson to take away from my blog today is that a workout can decrease your anxiety level. I should never stop working out given my general level of anxiety.
My mother worries about my not finding a church home. My brother stopped asking. I know many people who struggle within organized religion about and around homosexuality. I am not sure I will want to do so again.
In a secular vein...
This morning, I was the model of efficiency. I went to the credit union affiliated with my university, applied for and received an auto loan at 1% below the one the dealer had offered me, got the check, drove it to the dealership (25 miles away in L.A. traffic), and was at my desk before noon. I then called my insurance agent to delete the old car and add the new.
My insurance agent called me back and in a very matter-of-fact way inquired whether Honey and I were domestic partners and registered thusly with the state. I allowed as how we were. She announced brightly that our insurance company offered married policies to registered domestic partners and that we could get deeper discounts on our auto and homeowners' policies. "No exclusions!" she announced brightly.
We're in trouble, I think, when insurance companies are more forward thinking than religious and political institutions. Of course, in our capitalistic environment, industry often leads the way in social change. And saving money? Who's opposed to that? Not me. I wonder, though, about feeling more validated in my relationship when buying a car than I do in thinking about issues of faith and religion. It shouldn't take a leap of faith for me to want my minister and fellow congregants to have more trust in who I love and share my life with than my insurance agent does.
Last Easter I felt very guilty about not going to church though I had no actual interest in doing so. I worked out instead. My anxiety level went down after my workout. My therapist says that's a normal physiological reaction. So one lesson to take away from my blog today is that a workout can decrease your anxiety level. I should never stop working out given my general level of anxiety.
My mother worries about my not finding a church home. My brother stopped asking. I know many people who struggle within organized religion about and around homosexuality. I am not sure I will want to do so again.
In a secular vein...
This morning, I was the model of efficiency. I went to the credit union affiliated with my university, applied for and received an auto loan at 1% below the one the dealer had offered me, got the check, drove it to the dealership (25 miles away in L.A. traffic), and was at my desk before noon. I then called my insurance agent to delete the old car and add the new.
My insurance agent called me back and in a very matter-of-fact way inquired whether Honey and I were domestic partners and registered thusly with the state. I allowed as how we were. She announced brightly that our insurance company offered married policies to registered domestic partners and that we could get deeper discounts on our auto and homeowners' policies. "No exclusions!" she announced brightly.
We're in trouble, I think, when insurance companies are more forward thinking than religious and political institutions. Of course, in our capitalistic environment, industry often leads the way in social change. And saving money? Who's opposed to that? Not me. I wonder, though, about feeling more validated in my relationship when buying a car than I do in thinking about issues of faith and religion. It shouldn't take a leap of faith for me to want my minister and fellow congregants to have more trust in who I love and share my life with than my insurance agent does.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Circumnavigation
The building I work in is small. This is especially true for a campus building. Campus buildings, even here in second-floor-pancake-earthquake-zone-SoCal, are fairly large, multiple story deals. My building is not. It is one floor and has two entrances: one for my office and another on the south side of the building and a second entrance on the north side of the building.
The two offices on the south side of the building are busy student service centered ones. The north side of the building holds a number of community service offices.
I should also note that the building my office is in belongs to a college of which we are not a part. (My University, like many, is divided into sub-colleges, each with its own Dean, buildings, and money). I get reminded that the space is someone else's with some frequency when we have money conflicts. I control the money for a joint program administered by that college and my own. It's a good deal for me, actually. I'd rather have money than space. Anyway...
The north side of the building underwent a face-lift this summer. It looks really nice--new carpet, new paint, new furniture.
Standard pattern for south-siders is to park in the parking lot on the north side of the building, enter through the north entrance, and come through the rear entrance to our office. It's what I did. It's what everyone did.
Ok, so Other College and I are having one of our regular "let's all get along" meetings and they invite the guy who's in charge of the money and the space to come to the meeting. In a very roundabout way, he asks if we can stop using the north entrance. It's a reasonable request actually. They do counseling in that half of the building. They do work with children and adults with disabilities. They don't need 25 or 30 people walking through the lobby like it's a thoroughfare.
So, I get back from the meeting and write a very carefully worded request to my staff.
Keep in mind please that I am asking them to walk MAYBE 100 feet farther than they have been.
You'd have thought I asked them to run the L.A. Marathon. Or slog through a jungle on their knees. The hostility with which the request was greeted was palpable.
I made the request last Wednesday, when Office Manager was off. Monday when she came in after the holiday, the drama re-emerged. I'm talking coup d'etat level drama. Because they have to walk around a very small building.
I've been contemplating buying them all Table-Mate IIs so they can just live in the office. Or maybe Hover-Rounds?
Change can be hard. I admit as much. When minor change brings such consternation, imagine how they'll feel when we have to move our offices across campus. Actually don't imagine it, the horror is too much for the faint of heart.
Maybe Segways?
The two offices on the south side of the building are busy student service centered ones. The north side of the building holds a number of community service offices.
I should also note that the building my office is in belongs to a college of which we are not a part. (My University, like many, is divided into sub-colleges, each with its own Dean, buildings, and money). I get reminded that the space is someone else's with some frequency when we have money conflicts. I control the money for a joint program administered by that college and my own. It's a good deal for me, actually. I'd rather have money than space. Anyway...
The north side of the building underwent a face-lift this summer. It looks really nice--new carpet, new paint, new furniture.
Standard pattern for south-siders is to park in the parking lot on the north side of the building, enter through the north entrance, and come through the rear entrance to our office. It's what I did. It's what everyone did.
Ok, so Other College and I are having one of our regular "let's all get along" meetings and they invite the guy who's in charge of the money and the space to come to the meeting. In a very roundabout way, he asks if we can stop using the north entrance. It's a reasonable request actually. They do counseling in that half of the building. They do work with children and adults with disabilities. They don't need 25 or 30 people walking through the lobby like it's a thoroughfare.
So, I get back from the meeting and write a very carefully worded request to my staff.
Keep in mind please that I am asking them to walk MAYBE 100 feet farther than they have been.
You'd have thought I asked them to run the L.A. Marathon. Or slog through a jungle on their knees. The hostility with which the request was greeted was palpable.
I made the request last Wednesday, when Office Manager was off. Monday when she came in after the holiday, the drama re-emerged. I'm talking coup d'etat level drama. Because they have to walk around a very small building.
I've been contemplating buying them all Table-Mate IIs so they can just live in the office. Or maybe Hover-Rounds?
Change can be hard. I admit as much. When minor change brings such consternation, imagine how they'll feel when we have to move our offices across campus. Actually don't imagine it, the horror is too much for the faint of heart.
Maybe Segways?
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