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Monday, June 12, 2006

Suspicious

Honey had a cold last weekend and I congratulated myself all week for not getting it. Then, lo and behold, standing in line at Souplantation Friday night, I felt my throat getting sore. Sore throat led to aches led to stuffed up nose and headaches.

Honey and I were out of decongestant and I had managed (with some help from Biscuit) to destroy our hairbrush (yes we share(Honey and I, not Biscuit and I or Biscuit and Honey)...whatever). So I went to the drugstore this morning. I should add that I took our last decongestant this morning and I am very much congested. 12 hours my ass.

I guess I knew this, but when I got to the cough and cold aisle, anything with suphedrine wasn't there.

So, I picked out a new brush, got some Kleenex (anti viral Kleenex! Will technology never cease? Supposedly it kills 99.9% of cold and flu viruses. Now, I do have a question--if they can't cure the cold how can a Kleenex do what all of Western medicine can not? I mean, I believe in Kleenex. I'm just not sure these are SUPERKLEENEX.)

I go with my armload of stuff back to the pharmacy and ask for sudafed. The pharmacist looks at me as if I'm a threat.

"Do you have a cold?"

"Yesd." I then sniff to add emphasis to my congested response.

"Ok." She looks me up and down. I smile bravely and sniff again.

She starts to ring up the brush and Kleenex, then looks at me again and says--"I need ID." She scans it and nods when I don't come up on the drug dealer list they must have in the little box.

I walk out of the drugstore and imagine the little cameras that must be following my every move.

I walked out into the Southern California June gloom imagining all the trouble I could get into with my 12 Rite-Aid generic time release sudafed. She was right to worry. Once I tap into the superpower of the Kleenex and grind down those babies, I'll be able to take over the world.



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Watch out!

3 comments:

scout said...

Having just watched Meth: A County in Crisis, I have to say that you don't much fit the profile of a meth cook, but then I'm not a Rite-Aid employee—surely they receive expert-level training so that they can do their part in the war on drugs.

bryduck said...

Damn meth cookers. They're spoiling everything for the rest of us with congested nasal passages.
Good thing the air in SoCal's getting 1960ish again on us; soon we will all have permanently infected sinuses, so having a cold won't change anything. Yay!

WordsRock said...

In our neck of the woods, they don't ask for ID but we do have to sign for such drugs.

Those meth cookers are spoiling it for the rest of us!