I really like the idea of camping in a tent. My natal family was not of the camping variety. My mother really prefers a four-star experience. She'll do big chain hotels of the Marriott type, but not much "lower" than that.
I did get sent to summer camp as a child. First, I was sent to Presbyterian camp, which was a classic summer-camp kind of place with a little Sunday School thrown in. We hiked, canoed, and made lanyards. But we stayed in cabins, never tents.
I then transitioned to horse camp. Little Hope Ranch was an odd place, but I loved it (for the most part). There was no real "camping" at Little Hope. Girls rode horses twice a day. There was a pool (a mildewy pool) to swim in at night. Otherwise, it was all horses. Note to Rachel, if you're reading: Sunshade kicked Little Lamb's spotted butt. Little Hope is gone, replaced (from what I understand) by a VERY needed (not) new housing development.
Honey and I bought a cheap-ass tent at Pic n' Sav some years ago and tried camping a couple of times with it. The first time we showed up after dark and had to set up the tent with no real light. The second time wasn't much better.
Then I bought us a nice tent and an air mattress at REI. I also bought some hautemallows (those are high end marshmallows) and we tried it again. Other than the stale Whole Foods wheat hot dog buns, it went well.
Here are my camping rules for anyone over 35:
Get a big tent. (Two people in a four person tent will feel about right).
Get fresh buns, good beef or uncured chicken hot dogs, regular marshmallows, and good chocolate for s'mores.
Shop at the NPS concessionaires. They're a nice mix of touro-crap and cute shirts to buy your honey. They'll also have beer if you decide you need it--which you might.
Pick a cool National Park.
Listen to the nice ranger about the bears. If there are bears, use the bear box. Bears are bigger than you.
You will need to pee more often than usual overnight. Practice the "get up off the air mattress" maneuver until it's smooth.
Turn the flashlight/lantern off before you get back in the tent from the bathroom trip. You don't want those bugs in the tent. Trust me.
Eat breakfast at the hotel/lodge in your National Park. The civilized nature of served breakfast will make you feel better about not having showered.
Then go home. Take a shower and watch a good tv program. Tell the cats and dog all about your adventure. Post about what went wrong on your blog. Be sure to take some pictures. The big trees are better appreciated with visual aids.
Oh, and bring sporks. Everything tastes better next to a tent while being eaten with a spork.
13 comments:
I haven't gone camping in a long time -- I'm not sure I'm still up to the challenge. Room service -- now that I'm up to.
Hey, lookie there - a nice metal spork for camping!
Thank you for the guidance. Should we ever decide to camp I'm certain your thoughts will be most helpful.
Years ago, I hiked Mount LeCont in the Great Smoky Mountains National Park (a portion of the hike was along the Appalachian Trail, something that once held a lot of appeal for me.) Anyway, sleeping quarters were in the form of wooden bunks in a log lean-to surrounded by a chain link fence. Known as a "bear cage," the idea was to keep bears out. I saw one (cute) little black bear idly sniffing around outside of the fence early the next morning. It was quite a sight.
Enjoy your trip!
Hey, I forgot a camping experience! I joined the Ecology Club in high school and stayed in one of those self-same lean-to's on the Appalachian Trail near Brasstown Bald. Never been colder in my life. And I've hiked up Mt. LeCont and stayed at the cabins on the top. Cool.
BTW, Wendy, are you snail blogging in the pic?
Oh and in case anyone cares...I own one of the same model spork as in the picture.
Actually, I was reviewing a chart. I had to crop out one of my coworkers (coincidentally, the one whose shower we are attending tomorrow.) Case file review is definitely a non-technological exercise.
Also coincidentally, I damned near froze my ass off on LeCont. I think it's the coldest I've ever been.
We used to take the dogs camping with us back in the day when we went camping. To be completely honest, it was never my idea. I went with friends because I thought The Boy would enjoy it. He did. The dogs loved it too.
We'd frequent the George Washington National Forest here in Virginia. Nice park. One of the women we camped with was the Queen of Camp Coffee. I'd awake each morning with the scent of rich brewing coffee wafting in my tent. She also prepared delicious gourmet camp meals. We ate well with her around!
I'm rather curious as to why you need to pee more at night while camping... I don't recall that ever being an issue. But I was younger back that. Maybe it's some sorta camping issue that affects old folks? ;)
Hope you have a delightful adventure!
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The peeing thing: probably totally psychological. My theory...you wake up more, because it's cold and you're on the ground. You wake up--you need to pee.
I was assuming a psychological factor as well, something along the lines of needing to go more often simply by virtue of it being decidedly inconvenient to do so.
Camping without an air mattress sucks for anyone over the age of 25, but camping with an air mattress is a damn fun time: fire-building, river-walking, s'more-eating—what's not to love? I totally want to wake to the smell of camp coffee, though. Can you hook me up, Suzanne?
I love the tips section -- but i have to say i am with your mom on this one, Marriot or better. Sleeping outside has never appealed to me as a form of relaxation.
Hey there! I was taking a little trip down memory lane and looking to see whatever happened to Little Hope Ranch, and came across your blog. What years did you go there? I was there around 1980-1982. I found the old place on Google Maps, but it's clear it's not in business anymore, although the big indoor riding arena with "Little Hope Ranch" painted on the roof can still be seen in the satellite image, along with the mildewy pool :grin: Nice to know someone else has memories of going there too!
Hi DixieDiva--
How funny you found this on blogger. (I moved my blog, but the old one is still up). I went to Little Hope from about 79-81, so we were there at the same time (give or take).
My friend Rachel sent me their brochure from that era. It's pretty wonderful. Anyway, if you want to contact me directly about it e-mail me sporksforall at gmail.com
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